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1. What is an ideal “FunUsual” funeral?
An ideal “FunUsual” funeral will stand the test of time. It comes from an impressive lineage of the deceased’s strong character traits, his/her preferences, aversions, quirks and uniqueness. It is the last communication, moment to share, center stage to be had with the people who mattered to the deceased. It is the last hurrah, and it is all about them.
Opposite of a baby shower or a birth announcement, it is just as relevant in that it is the announcement of the presence and bonds of the soul in another form. It is a graduation from the matter of life. The essence of the deceased loved one is housed in the intangibles we face every day. We will find the essence of the deceased when we use our intuition, umagination, deduction, adaptability, faith, common sense, invention and improvisation to name a few.
An ideal “FunUsual” funeral is one that respects the body that fit the soul. It is comfortable, durable, archetypal and gives the impression of solidity and simple integrity.
2. Why do I or my loved one even need to have a “FunUsual” funeral? I am not that important.
“FunUsual” funerals are not only for the famous and the infamous, the notorious and the iconic. They are for the every day man or woman. They level the playing field and give credit to each and every one of our unique expressions of a lifetime. We each have had them, whether they were publicized or not.
We leave with unique perspectives and expressions through the intangibles: what we gave our attention and focus, how we deduced things, how we used our attention, imagination and intuition. To our loved ones we leave modeling for our adaptability, resilience, agility and facileness. We leave our preferences, aversions and discernments. We leave our trail, our map of experiences and tools that helped us along the way. All that is ours we leave to those we love to inherit and use in their own lives. They can sift through was is usable and not usable for their own lives so that they can stand on our shoulders and catapult their own legacies forward and amplify their soul’s expression.
“FunUsual” funeral is the last mark of our legacy. It is the divine right of every man or woman.
3. Why will our loved ones respond to FunUsusal Funerals™ over the traditional funeral?
As human beings we respond to textures, colors, craftsmanship of a life well lived. We respond to the beauty that reveals strength of character. We resonate with the history of character that recreates life and death within a 100 year human time span.
A life fully lived has a legacy that has deep wearing and weathering; has the qualities of being freshly cleaned and planed on the surface so we can see the strong stalk from which the soul came. A legacy has textures, colors, craftsmanship of values, beliefs, delusions and perceptions. In its raw bareness of ‘flaws’ and ‘mistakes’, stripped of it’s beauty it recreates life and death choices, over and over again throughout a life.
We all understand that in another. We all speak the same language of the soul. Our DNA resonates to the legacy of another. Our legacy breathes us day to day, birth to death. A FunUsual Funeral lets us breath once more with our deceased loved one.
4. Why would I want to make light or bring humor or make ‘a party’ at such a somber, grief stricken moment, and in full public view at death, when it seems so insensitive and disrespectful?
We are all made in perfection, a clean canvas of beautiful humanity. If we remained the clean pure canvas at death we would have wasted an experiential opportunity for our soul. It is not the moment to “Make nice”. Fit the conformity. Be bland and fit in. That would be akin to being thrown in one big community grave, homogenized to grey so no one knew the deceased even existed.
It is not the time to honor the clean canvas from which we all come. The flaws, mistakes, irregularities, distortions and wear and tear are engaging. It creates chemistry, attraction, aversion and movement toward or away from our intention. But it engages us. The striations, mottled, rusted, dank and melding variations invite us to look again. It catches our attention, and draws us in. We are curious rubber-neckers in life. We are intrigued with how one takes an eyesore and transforms it to graceful. We are hypnotized by the way our fellow man’s life graduates from strong to pale, even to a washed out hue.
Just as we are mesmerized by day’s dawn, so too are we equally entranced with night’s dusk. Comparatively we are drawn to the fireworks of birth, so too the fading of the sparkle of life at death. We want to know because we, who attend the funeral as mourners know that our time will come too. And as Peggy Lee sang, we wonder, “Is that all there is?”
5. How will I feel once I have given a “FunUsual” funeral?
The eye that listens to the heart and works harder is rewarded. In the absence of brilliant clear color, of new, better and best, typical, tried and true, the shadows will reveal what is serene, sophisticated, restrained, quiet, and recessed. It will not weary yours or the eyes of others who the deceased loved and bonded. A weary eye tires the body and soul. Quiet softness has the opposite effect. It inspires peace and calm and certainty. It puts a salve on grief, loss and void. It puts ones own mortality in perspective. That is the language of nature. It is never one shade, never all white or all beige. Look at it’s underside. Get close. It is not monotonous. Nature shows the natural effects of weather, age and adversity. Just like your own life. Just like the deeased’s life.
It is real. It has resonance. Your legacy will have resonance to you mostly. But the legacy of the deceased, in a FunUsual Funeral will be carried forward because of you, like a dandilion blown into the wind. The seed of the legacy of the deceased will be carried forward. That will have a healing calming quality that will intrigue your loved ones.
Further, the benefit of leaving a way to bond with your loved one, past the portal of passing, to be comfort them in your loss, grief and void will be an incentive to be curious and compassionate in your own life, to yourself and to others. It will take the sting of fear out of the completion of this natural life cycle for you, and give others the courage when they themselves have to face finality for themselves.